I write to escape.
I watched a really under rated movie tonight. Its been on Hulu for almost a year now. I kept seeing ads for it and thought it was a porn. I was wrong. Now I am wondering if it has won any awards.
"Real Life Ain't Like the Movies... Life is just a bunch of stories you go thru and they all end sooner or later."
- Stevie Long as "Stanny" in Strictly Sexual.
I don't know why, but I teared up a little at the end of this movie. Thats a lie... I do know why and to clear it up a little bit, the first thing I wrote down was "How do I be better at me?" Depressing? I'm not sure. All I can tell from my reaction is that I am terrible at everything when it comes to dating. Yeah, I am pretty entertaining, but there is never meeting half way. I'm attracted, but don't know if I'm serious. I want to be serious, but I don't know what to do after the initial flirting and getting to know the persons last name... I never feel good enough and anyone who knows me will tell you otherwise. I just don't know what I am so unsure about!
Although there is always someone I am interested in, or two, or three... I never am able to be alright with just one due to the fear of rejection. Absolute confidence shaking. Then I feel like a hypocrite when I can't help getting jealous if they have two or three. Its a never ending cycle that I can't get out of.
You want to be original and exciting and thought provoking so you can keep the conversation light and fun. But I can't do all the work all the time... I want someone who is interested in talking back to me about what they want. I keep finding these really great guys, but have no idea how to keep them around. Everyone always says "be yourself," and this whole time I believed that doing just that was enough. Now I come to find you have to compromise and share. Some of the blame is on me.
I say I hate playing games, and I always seem to get the "you're confusing" line. I'm either too witty for my own good or I have no idea what I am talking about. A pet peeve of mine. Another, when I am talking to someone and they get back to me on all different forms of media... I just want a phone call.
You would think this was me complaining a lot about something I wasn't shaken by, but here I am putting me down. Its weird and I think I need a vacation. Aside from that I really do like someone, or I think I do. Its not helping when he is kind of "hanging out" with another girl who is probably amazing as me, but I feel like I am in a game show like wipeout or ninja warrior... I guess I am going with the flow too much and not really figuring out what I want.
So there you go. Thats why I teared up... Stupid life quote.
Monday, July 12, 2010
Friday, June 25, 2010
Hollywood and TV Shows
The life and times of my viewing pleasure on Hulu:
I was a hermit for about 3 months while I was watching all 6 seasons of LOST. Though now I couldn't even tell you the names of half the cast because I have actually blocked most of that emotional roller coaster/time warping hullabaloo! Though I can still rank my top favorite shows based on storyline, character rise/demise, comedy, and actors. I know, you may think it was or still is a waste of time, but I beg to differ. If I watch drama happen on TV, it hardly ever happens in the mitst of my own life. So here we go!
Number 10. THE SIMPSONS
-Still holding strong after 464 episodes, it still makes me laugh out loud.
Number 9. FAMILY GUY
-It is just impressive how the creators stay true to themselves and fuck with everyone else to the limits of broadcasting substandards.
Number 8. ALWAYS SUNNY
-I hated it at first, but I cant help but to slip into a conversation with out bring up ASiP!
Number 6. GLEE
-I know what you're thinking, "I thought she'd put it as #1, wrong, it is amazing, yes, but I think everyone is tired of hearing about how much I like Glee, but it is an amazing show!
Number 4. COMMUNITY
-After an awful start this show had turned the heads and bent over to cough. I love it!
Number 3. THE OFFICE
-Its been on top for every season its on. Too many characters to love!
Number 2. 30 ROCK
-Tina Fey is a genius.
OH CAN YOU SEE IT NOW?
CAN YOU GUESS MY FAVORITE SHOW?
ok, you got it.
Number 1. PARKS AND REC
-DUH! I mean Amy Poehler is my hero.
So Some honorable mentions:
KYLE XY, I'm hooked on Matt Dallas, even if he is (Gay) shhh!
Things that have had a long enough run:
Gossip Girl.
Shows that should be cancelled:
Pretty Little Liars, its basically SORORITY ROW TURNED TV SHOW, HOW WILL IT END!?!?!?
The Gates No offense, but Vampires will probably become real if any more shows or movies are made about them!
Hope you enjoyed!!!
I was a hermit for about 3 months while I was watching all 6 seasons of LOST. Though now I couldn't even tell you the names of half the cast because I have actually blocked most of that emotional roller coaster/time warping hullabaloo! Though I can still rank my top favorite shows based on storyline, character rise/demise, comedy, and actors. I know, you may think it was or still is a waste of time, but I beg to differ. If I watch drama happen on TV, it hardly ever happens in the mitst of my own life. So here we go!
Number 10. THE SIMPSONS
-Still holding strong after 464 episodes, it still makes me laugh out loud.
Number 9. FAMILY GUY
-It is just impressive how the creators stay true to themselves and fuck with everyone else to the limits of broadcasting substandards.
Number 8. ALWAYS SUNNY
-I hated it at first, but I cant help but to slip into a conversation with out bring up ASiP!
Number 7. LOST
-Again, with all my hermitting why is it not #1? READ ON!
Number 6. GLEE
-I know what you're thinking, "I thought she'd put it as #1, wrong, it is amazing, yes, but I think everyone is tired of hearing about how much I like Glee, but it is an amazing show!
Number 5. JUSTIFIED
-Gotta love those westerns. I mean seriously, this show has the drama of extremes.
Number 4. COMMUNITY
-After an awful start this show had turned the heads and bent over to cough. I love it!
Number 3. THE OFFICE
-Its been on top for every season its on. Too many characters to love!
Number 2. 30 ROCK
-Tina Fey is a genius.
OH CAN YOU SEE IT NOW?
CAN YOU GUESS MY FAVORITE SHOW?
ok, you got it.
Number 1. PARKS AND REC
-DUH! I mean Amy Poehler is my hero.
So Some honorable mentions:
KYLE XY, I'm hooked on Matt Dallas, even if he is (Gay) shhh!
Things that have had a long enough run:
Gossip Girl.
Shows that should be cancelled:
Pretty Little Liars, its basically SORORITY ROW TURNED TV SHOW, HOW WILL IT END!?!?!?
The Gates No offense, but Vampires will probably become real if any more shows or movies are made about them!
Hope you enjoyed!!!
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